Cris Collinsworth Is On a Boat...and Almost Dies!!!

It's Monday! That means you just made it through another horrible day of putting up with your overweight boss, stale coffee, and  "PC LOAD LETTER" error messages from your crappy HP printer, all while starting work one hour earlier thanks to daylight savings time. There really is no way to help you forget your miserable life, but maybe this little nugget of happiness will make it a little more bearable.

There has not been many good things to come out of Cincinnati, OH and that statement is personified by the lousy football commentary provided on NBC by everyones favorite ex-Bengal receiver, Cris Collinsworth. So, you ask, how would a story about this annoying blabbermouth make you forget about your case of the Mondays?



If you haven't heard by now, over the weekend Cris was enjoying a delicious "Steak Collinsworth" at an eatery he frequently visits called Jeff Ruby's Waterfront Restaurant. This restaurant is not your normal restaurant, it exists on a barge that is supposed to be permanently anchored to a dock on the visually pleasing Ohio River. I know, so far this is boring, but hang with me.

As reported by the Covington Fire Chief, CHUCK NORRIS (no joke!!!), a main anchoring cable broke off the barge sending this annoying announcer and 82 other victims down the raging river. To every football fans chagrin, this floating Applebee's came to rest under a bridge downstream, with Mr. Collinsworth escaping unharmed.

Ruby's Waterfront Restaurant stuck under a bridge

All jokes aside, everyone made it out of this "extremely horrific" situation alright. Cris will undoubtedly have a new perspective on life, which might actually make his Sunday afternoon play-by-play somewhat bearable. NOT!!!

Check out this horrible song that might help you appreciate Monday a little bit more!